As a personal finance educator, I like to pull back the curtain and talk about money openly. For the last 3 years, I’ve built my brand Ambitious Adulting, based on transparency. Today, I’m sharing with you how much it cost to help me be comfortable during labour. The cost breakdown follows the birth story.

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During my pregnancy, my partner and I watched dozens of labour and delivery videos to get tips on how to have an enjoyable, stress-free and comfortable experience. We wanted to labour at home for as long as possible, and maybe even try a home birth depending on how everything panned out. 

My birth plan was very flexible. The only thing I wanted was plenty of snacks, meditation music, a zen space, and my mom and partner to be with me the entire time. Oddly, I also really wanted my mom to braid my hair. As a kid, she would sit me down every morning before school and do my hair. Eventually, I got too squirmy and impatient so I got her to stop, but now, more than 20 years later, I wanted this experience again. I craved the comfort of my mom’s fingers massaging my scalp. 

Other than those requests, I was open to anything that would get my baby here safely. 

Our sweet boy was born on April 22, after 23 hours of labour.

Here is the timeline of events and what products I used throughout the experience.

Wednesday, April 21

1am: woke up with cramps 

3am: got out of bed and came downstairs to bounce on the exercise ball

6am: I started getting back cramps and thought, ok this might be it. I messaged my mom to stay on guard. 

9am: my mom arrived and helped me labour. Contractions were now every 20-30 mins. 

I got a few minutes of relief and snacked on some of the labour snacks we prepared ahead of time. We learned that you don’t want to have a full stomach or bladder when delivering so smaller snacks were better. Here are some things that I enjoyed: 

• Cut up fruit and veggies
• Pedialyte freezies to help with staying hydrated
• Frozen fruit popsicles 

Noon: My partner and mom started filling up a blow-up pool in the living room. We didn’t get a legit birthing pool because I wasn’t planning on giving birth in the water. Instead, we opted for a blow-up pool and hope to use it in the backyard when it’s hot out. 

After about an hour in the water, my contractions intensified and came every 10 mins.

4pm: By the afternoon, I was hoping my labour would end soon. My mother in law came over as I wanted both of our moms to be part of the experience. At this point, I was in a trance in my own world. I wanted to tune out the sounds and concentrate on my breath. All I remember was asking my partner not to leave my side and to keep applying pressure on my lower back. 

6:30 pm: In the evening, I was exhausted. I was getting contractions every minute but they weren’t a minute long yet so technically, we still couldn’t go to the hospital. After a few minutes of this, and me screaming in pain, my mother-in-law convinced us to call my midwife and tell her we were headed to the hospital. I was so scared they would turn me away for not being at the recommended 5-1-1 rule. 

The 5-1-1 Rule: The contractions come every 5 minutes, lasting 1 minute each, for at least 1 hour.

At this point, I didn’t have any of the other labour signs. My water hadn’t broken, I didn’t lose my mucous plug, or have a bloody show. 

7:00 pm: We arrived to the hospital and the triage nurses said I was only 2cm dilated. They said I could walk around, but at this point, I could barely move. Luckily, when my midwife arrived a few minutes later, she said I was 4cm dilated and they would admit me. I begged for the epidural and fortunately, the anesthesiologist came quickly. After more than 12 hours in labour, I needed a break. 

For the next few hours, I had contractions but I wasn’t in excruciating pain. I still felt the pressure each time and it was painful but not unbearable. Here are a few things that helped: 

• Using a shirt to bite down on 
• Focusing on a blinking light on the ceiling – possibly the sprinkler system 

11 pm: For about 2 minutes, I felt a very strange sensation and shortly after, my midwife ran into the room. She explained that they baby’s heart rate was de-escalting too quickly and my care was now being transferred to the OB and nursing staff. The doctor came in and explained that the baby was too stressed and I would likely need an C-section. 5 nurses watched the monitor while I grimaced in pain they were waiting for his heart beat to regulate but it never did. The pressure was so intense and they started organizing the operating room logistics. 

I was 10cm dilated, and they had me try to push one last time before moving forward with the C-section. I was exhausted, but tried to push to no avail, he was too high up and now his heart rate was spiking. 

I was wheeled down to the operating room and cried. Even though I was open and aware to the possibility of C-Section, I felt like I had failed. My body failed me and I felt betrayed.  I tried everything and visualized a smooth delivery and the moment 5 nurses and the doctor rushed into my room, I knew that he wasn’t going to “slip and slide” right out like I had hoped. 

To prepare for an “easy” delivery,  I ate dates every day for 2 months, I drank red raspberry leaf tea daily in the 3rd trimester, I bounced on my exercise ball constantly, I did curb walking, took my prenatal vitamins and supplements, went to massage therapy, acupuncture, and pelvic floor physiotherapy. I also invested in hypnobirthing classes and attended prenatal therapy sessions, but when the time came to push, I felt like none of that mattered. All of the prep work I did for a vaginal delivery was for naught. 

I calmed myself down and tried to reframe my mind. I told myself, I did my best. The doctors know best. It’s ok, you’re still a badass. All that matters is that the baby is safe and healthy. Put your ego aside. 

The C-Section was quick! They held him up and I saw my perfect baby but then the doctors whisked him away and a new wave of sadness hit me. 

I didn’t get to hold him right away. I didn’t get my “golden hour” with him. I always pictured holding my baby right away, covered in gunk and laying him on my chest but that didn’t happen. He was away from me for 40mins while I was stitched up. I lay there on the operating table, wondering how he looked and how he was doing. 

Luckily, my partner never let the baby out of his sight, and he got to hold him shortly after he was born. They got to do skin-to-skin and even though I still get sad that I missed out on my golden hour with my baby, I’m glad he got to bond with his daddy. 

Overall, we are over the moon with our baby’s arrival. Even though the delivery had some unexpected twists, everything turned out fine. We are happy, and healthy; and at the day, that is all that matters.  

Now, for the breakdown of how much it cost to be comfortable during labour.

Know someone who is pregnant right now? Share this birth story with them.

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